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Wednesday, March 21, 2018

Not every YM should serve a mission

“Not every YM should serve a mission.”  Does that sound like heresy?  Am I just a disgruntled Latter-Day Saint mom who is lashing out against the Church?

Rest assured ~ I am a fully committed member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints who whole-heartedly sustains the Prophet, serves diligently in my callings, and supports the many missionaries I know who are currently serving missions throughout the world.

Also know ~ I don’t dispute that President Spencer W. Kimball said, “Every worthy young man should fill a mission,” nor that every prophet since then has given the same counsel.

Yet, even though I have a testimony deeply rooted in my Savior, Jesus Christ, and I, without doubt, love and support the prophets of the restored Church, and I consecrate my time and talents to building up His kingdom ~ I also firmly believe not every young man should serve a mission.  Maybe it’s health reasons or anxiety or a lack of testimony that keeps some young men from serving missions.  Whatever the reason, this one-size-fits-all belief sends so many wonderful Latter-Day Saint moms down the path of doubt, disappointment, and despair. 

How do you show up ~ as a mom and as a daughter of God ~ when you’re coming from a place of fear?  How does it serve you to believe that every young man should serve a mission?  How does agency fit into all of this?

There are lots of “should’ s” in our Church (we should go to our meetings, we should do our visiting teaching, we should pay tithing).  None of us do them all perfectly, yet we sure beat ourselves up over this one when it doesn’t happen.

It doesn’t have to be this way.  You can have a better relationship with your son, even better than if he had served a mission.  You can have confidence in yourself as a Latter-Day Saint mom, even though your son isn’t serving.  You can show up in your LDS life from a place of faith, even if he’s not making the choices you thought he would.

“Not every YM should serve a mission.”  If you want to know how I can believe that and still be a strong, active member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, I can show you how.  Email me at kelly@findpeaceinparenting.com.

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